Dear Technology

Sorry for pissing you off, but really, when will you invent the fucking Hoverboard!!!  I've been really really patient.

And as I am typing this my headphone shocked my ear...

Decaf Coffee & Other Mumbo Jumbo

I'm back!  And you know what's about as pointless as dog genitalia?  Decaf coffee.  Why not drink alcohol free whiskey?

Anyway, my band Harlott was played on the Local Buzz http://www.1029thebuzz.com/ Sunday night.  Sunday night my NFL team the Steelers won the AFC and are Super Bowl bound!!!  It's been a great start for this week.  Hopefully things pick up this year and into next.  That way I can blog full time.  I know you want it.  And now, a picture of Alf.

I'm no longer a scorpio?

According to this website http://tiny.cc/dldu1 I am no longer a Scorpio.

Capricorn: Jan. 20 - Feb. 16

Aquarius: Feb. 16 - March 11

Pisces: March 11 - April 18

Aries: April 18 - May 13

Taurus: May 13 - June 21

Gemini: June 21 - July 20

Cancer: July 20 - Aug. 10

Leo: Aug. 10 - Sept. 16

Virgo: Sept. 16 - Oct. 30

Libra: Oct. 30 - Nov. 23

Scorpio: Nov. 23 - 29

Ophiuchus: Nov. 29 - Dec. 17

Sagittarius: Dec. 17-Jan. 20

So I decided to do some research (google) Virgo traits.  My favorite so far? 
"The Virgo man is blessed with sharp memory and tends to pay close attention to details. You don't have to remind him about birthdays, anniversaries or other important events."
 Chrystal know's first hand this is NOT true.

I always like being a Scirpio, mainly because all the "traits" were true to my personality.  Thank god I didn't get my massive Scorpion tattoo when I was 21. 

Dear Chrystal,

The spelling errors are intentional.  Leave me alone.

Please, someone stop Aaron Lewis....

...From making awful music!  I know I am very opinionated when it comes to music, but seriously?  This song sounds like it was written by a 5 year old in 10 minutes while drunk and high off glue.  Let's just throw a bunch of country cliques into one, and call it a song.  I can't believe this piece o shit is getting airplay.  Maybe I'm chasing the wrong dream?  Or I really don't know good music?

That's all.

New Year!

Well, it's about that time to make a New Years resolution and never stick to it!  So this year, I'm going to try a little reverse psychology on that shit!

1. I will not go to the gym.
2. I will eat a bunch of junk food and drink loads of beer
3. I will make an effort to shit, fuck, ass, or piss in ever sentence.
4. I will do my best to be the biggest a-hole in the world.
5. I will make sure to be as lazy as I possibly can
6. I will be sure to complain about anything and everything.
7. I will ignore all my friends in different cities.
8. I will make an effort to gain 15 lbs every week.
9. I will not help the band out in any way.
10. I will get worse at the guitar.

There, let's see if that does the trick.

Happy New Year!

P.S.